Thursday, October 15, 2009

Know-it-alls: Scott waxes philosophical




Why is it that often man thinks he must understand all there is to know about God before it even becomes conceivable to believe in Him?

Men, whose worldview by definition already denies the possibility of a supernatural being beyond himself, tries to define such a being, and upon failing to do so fully to his liking, concludes that said being clearly does not exist. God is comparable to a math equation in which the answer, rather than having a well-defined numerical answer possibly with a few decimal places, is instead, "the limit does not exist." God is boundless and while we know parts of his character, parts of the equation, when trying to solve the problem, in the end the only result we can come to is that His limit does not exist. Certainly no mathematician would demand a student to find another suitable solution to the problem, that IS the solution! Even more, nobody would consider attempting to discredit mathematics as being fallacy. There is such a thing as something being defined as undefined.

The means by which some men make this attempt to solve this problem and explain God already set them up for failure. They limit His existence and His character to man-made rules based upon what we "know." But how can you prove a supernatural spiritual being exists when by default your rules already deny that possibility by limiting it to a physical realm? Think about it: A thought is some kind of electrical transmission; a memory, a reaction between neurons; neither of which we fully understand nor can we pin down a physical location in the brain where memories are stored, yet nobody doubts that man can think and can remember. Is a memory physical or is it something else? If it is just physical, why can't we extract a memory from the brain like we can extract an organ or a blood sample? Maybe it's not just physical, maybe it's something more... But if one tries to argue that God is "something more," then well it's just a bunch of fanatical religious mumbo-jumbo! And we have scientists who claim to "examine the evidence" but in reality they are merely stacking the deck, so to speak, against what they already believe to be false.

Don't hear what I'm not saying. All this is not to say that there is not scientific evidence supporting the existence of God, more specifically the claims of Christianity. There are scientists who know much more than I that make extremely convincing argumentsscientifically for the existence of God. But that's not my goal here, my point is a philosophical argument, not scientific. (I find the Kalam cosmological argument to be especially fascinating, myself)

A quote comes to mind, although I'm not sure who said it: "God created man in His own image. And man, being a gentleman, returned the favor." We have an obsession with anthropomorphism. We define our universe in relation to ourselves. We characterize life through a very human, very mortal looking glass. The world is defined in man-made terms and what something "is" or what we think about it often depends on how it relates to us. God certainly does reveal himself to us in anthropomorphic images to help us, with our feeble minds, to understand His infinite character. But as soon as we LIMIT Him to just that, we deny any possibility of knowing Him further.

Isn't it reasonable to expect that a supernatural being that exists in some way beyond His creation and thus is far greater than it, call Him God, would in some ways be beyond mortal man's understanding? A being such as this would be impossible to define in terms of man. Why SHOULD He reveal Himself completely to us? And even if He were to do so, who is to say we would even be able to comprehend it?

The good news is that for those that choose to believe, God WILL reveal Himself and He WILL be fully known. The apostle Paul writes in 1 Corinthians 13:12 - "For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known." I sincerely believe we were not meant, in our present state, to know God fully. It would be too much, we couldn't handle it. But I also sincerely believe God has revealed enough of Himself to warrant belief... even if we don't know it all.

Thank You!

Wow. I can't believe how many beautiful comments I received on that last post! My eyes filled with tears as I read what everyone wrote. I just want to thank everyone who wrote something about my mom or supported me in that last entry, it meant the world to me. Sometimes I get so caught up in my own emotions and feelings and forget how many other people out there loved and miss her deeply. It helps to know that I'm not alone in this-that other people love and miss her just as much as I do. I have done plenty of my own grieving with those closest to me and on my own, but it felt really good to not ignore my feelings on her birthday and to write something about it. I love that I could honor her if even in a small way. All of your comments really helped me to love a little deeper, make my step a little lighter, and uplift my heart and spirit. Thank you.

An Eternal Perspective


I am getting better daily, but I would be lying if I said that I didn't have a problem with worrying about little things that don't really matter from time to time. The ladies in my small group are reading a book called, "Calm my Anxious Heart," by Linda Dillow. The first chapter is about how to be content in all circumstances. One of the key points discusses viewing life from God's point of view and putting life in perspective. What is really important? Relationships with God, family, and friends? Or keeping your house clean? Are you worrying about all the little things that you have to do today? Okay. So when you put it like that, it sounds a bit obvious. But honestly, how many times do you find yourself worrying about that homework assignment that you have put off far too long, that huge pile of laundry that you just really don't have time for right now, or maybe that pound or two you gained last weekend? It just doesn't.really.matter. when you put it through God's eternal point of view.

I had one of those huge life transforming moments a few years ago sitting on Newport beach. It was a week or so after my mom had died, and I was a sophomore at Chapman University. I had just flown back to Orange County after having attended my mom's funeral, and I had that huge pit in the bottom of my stomach. I didn't know if I had the strength to go back to Chapman when my heart was in Phoenix with my family, best friends, and Scott (whom I had been dating long distance for about a year at that point). I sat on that beach staring endlessly at the eternally deep, mysterious ocean worrying about whether or not I should move back "home" to Phoenix. I worried about if I should finish the semester or not, if I would feel like a failure if I transferred schools, the headache of physically moving all of my belongings to another state..... all of that. It was at that moment that the holy spirit calmed my heart and God whispered in my ear. It was as if He was telling me that my worries were like small insignificant pennies buried in that deep ocean. It was as if he was telling me that in the grand scheme of what my life was going to look like, my problems at that precise moment in time weren't really that big of a deal. My worries were so small compared to the LIFE that He had planned for me, and who was I to waste any time dwelling on them? I felt in that moment that life was too short to not follow my heart, and I needed to leave those tiny pennies at rest in the huge, open ocean. And you know the rest of the story... moved to Phoenix, got engaged 8 months later, and shortly after married the love of my life. Things ended up turning out pretty well... couldn't have planned it better than God for sure.:)

What are you truly living for today? What will you let consume you? All those little worries and problems? Or do you choose to be consumed by the blessed king of kings who is controller over all things?

Monday, October 12, 2009

A Celebration of Life


I'm going to write about something that I have never blogged about before-something I've been too afraid to blog about-something I didn't know how to blog about, my mom. It's been a little over 3 years since she died, and I never wanted to publicly write about her or talk about her with anyone that wasn't really close to me. It seemed too personal, and it just felt like since no one besides those closest to me would understand, it was pointless. Plus, I didn't want people to just feel sorry for me. I'm a strong person, and I wanted to just be ME-not seen as the girl who has been through a lot because her mom died tragically before her time.

In addition to that, it seemed like talking about her in the open would take away the special closeness that we shared. That somehow if I kept our memories and secrets inside, they would stay sacred forever. Then I thought about today, what would have been her 48th birthday, and it doesn't seem fair that the day could just go by unnoticed, undeclared. I thought about other people I know that have had parents or someone close to them die before their time, and I thought about how reading about how other people dealt with their trials has helped me in my grieving process. And I thought... maybe I could help someone too. Maybe if I am open enough to talk publicly about what happened to me and my family, maybe someone will be touched and take one step closer to healing. And then maybe that person can share their story and help someone else.

It's weird that time just stops for her, and that she doesn't get to continue on life's journey anymore. I've shed many tears wishing that she could have been there on my wedding day, that she could have seen Erik graduate from high school, know that 3 of her kids so far have gone off to college, and know that her youngest child is loving high school. I'm sad knowing that she will never hold her first grandchild, or know how much I love my husband. I wish I could thank her today for teaching me about how to be a woman, and tell her that so much of the way I live my every day life is because of her.

At the same time, I'm thankful that I knew her for 20 full years, and that she did know Scott. Scott and I had a crush on each other in the 8th grade, so he used to come over and hang out after school sometimes. We were dating when she passed in February of 06', and she had told her best friend a few months before that she had thought he was "the one." It's these little things that I'm thankful for. While she will miss out on so many good things to come in life, I'm thankful for what she did get to be a part of, and that she did have 45 years of life on Earth. And if she can't see what's going on on Earth now, then I'll just have to take eternity to fill her in on everything some day.

Happy birthday, Mom.